ReCoder (recoder) wrote,

  • Mood:

Countries vs. Programming Languages

  • African click language communities = Punch cards
    — Click Click Clack Click Clack -> 11010 
  • Mongolia = RPG
    — The ancient empire
  • Aztecs = Lisp
    — Was once the most advanced but then got completely lost. We’ve been re-inventing it ever since
  • China = Logowriter
    — It’s been around forever and you only do what Logowriter allows you. Turn 90 degrees right. Now.
  • Vietnam = Assembly
    — Third world concepts that are much more efficient than a Big War Machine.
  • Khazakstan = Cobol
  • Israel = Scheme
    — Generally acknowledged as intrinsically powerful, despite its small size, but also because of the ideas it has generated. Strong idealistic or religious attachment for some; often viewed with antagonism by others. Language not mainstream but ancestor to many others. Very specific cultural appeal
  • England = Smalltalk
    — Where most of civilized culture comes from.
  • Canada = Ada
    — Structured, friendly, bureaucratic, what could be more Canadian?
  • Sweden = Erlang
    — One word: Ericsson (and the cold)
  • Hungary = Haskell
    — Because no one understands hungarian
  • Ireland = Prolog
    — Both use weird logic
  • France = Pascal
    — Pascal’s nationality not withstanding, who else tells you how you should be using their language more than the Academie Francaise?
  • Germany = C
    — The most ruthlessly efficient
  • Austria = C++
    — The people still speak German but they’re a bit friendlier
  • India = PHP
    — Finally coming into the civilized world but still mostly used as a cheap hack
  • Poland = Delphi
    — Was once great but its space had been invaded by others
  • USA = Java
    — What other country has such a large bureaucracy with such a huge number of loopholes and inconsistencies?
    — Called a War On C but no one knows why
  • Switzerland = C#
    — All they really want to do is make money.
  • Japan = Ruby
    — By far the most advanced, at the forefront of the cutting edge. Also insane.
  • South Korea = Python
    — Just as advanced in Ruby in most ways, and its rival.
  • Vatican City = XML
    — XML isn’t really a language but that’s ok because Vatican City isn’t really a country.
    — Declares reality to be whatever it wants it to be.

© Guillaume Theoret, есть перевод от muranoff


Tags: humor
promo recoder august 1, 2018 12:09 36
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Не так давно Фейсбук научил меня ещё одной классификации людей, в дополнение к стратегам и тактикам, интерналистам и экстерналистам, и разным морально-политическим приверженцам. Впервые эта классификация описана ещё двадцать лет назад Картером и Сэнджером в книге The Programmer's Stone…
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